Parallel

No. I am not the same math fanatic as my son. I wish!


I have been debating for about a year about writing this post but here it goes...


I feel like I have been living a parallel life to my family's since...well always.

I had my first kid when I was 30. I was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease when I was 29. So when my family started I was already sick.

"Sorry Sam...you really shouldn't go camping with us. You haven't been healthy lately."

Umm..."but I really want to go."

"Bad idea."

"S**t! But I really want to go!"

So I didn't go.

Remicade put me into remission when I was 37.

For instance, even when we are on vacation I can't do all that I want to do. I got left here...

when we went to Cleveland while the boys explored the rest of the gardens. I guess we always knew there was something else wrong with me. Hey, at least it was a beautiful place to be left behind.

Then, at 43 I get diagnosed with inflammatory arthritis (in every joint, and most ligaments and muscles in my body).  Really?


NOT FAIR!!!


I also have debilitating headaches. I've had those since I was a teen. They are probably migraines and I have yet to find the medication to work for me. It sucks!

There are so many times when the boys go to do stuff, in the house and out, without me because I'm not feeling well. I'm missing my life..and theirs. Everyone assumes I'm not coming with them or doing with them. I feel stupid when I do feel good and want to go with or do and I have to ask my own family if I can join them. I know I can but they don't expect it, so I do feel like I do have to ask if I can participate in my own life.

I want to be a work at home mom for the kids. Not because my body can't always hack It. By "It", I mean life in general.

I'm putting all of my confidence in this new medicine...Cimzia. I really hope it takes care of both of my immune diseases.

I hope it gives me back my life...Please!

Thing a Day: 21

Not creative but certainly fun!

Miniature golf. Need I say more?

Thing a Day: 6

I know I missed day 5, but I found myself sick yesterday. I was unable to do much of anything but lay down (somewhere near the bathroom).

Anyway...

My family and I have been trying to go snow shoeing since the beginning of December but there is always something that doesn't cooperate, whether it's the weather or my health.

Today, everything did cooperate. It almost didn't though. It was actually kind of funny.

Since my son has grown about 8" since the last time he wanted snow pants...we ran into a bit of a problem. It's a good thing that I'm short (5'3").

My 13 year old son ended up wearing the snow pants marked "womens medium". I wore the pair marked "14/16". They were a little shorter (in the crotch) than I would have liked...but I "sucked it up".

Then we went to a nearby park. walked around, ran around, made snow angels,

threw snowballs at each other, and watched a couple of dogs having a ball in the snow.

 I love watch animals play in the snow.

We all had a great time, followed by hot chocolate for the boys and tea for me.

Month of Gratitude: day 8

Definitely not a fancy dinner but candle light is nice. D's idea.  Made dinner even better. Boy, three little candles put off lots of light. I was afraid that A would complain "It's too dark. It makes me sad." But he didn't. Yahoo! We actually eat by candlelight. Fun!

Just spotted this today...

from Polka Dot Cottage

I'm going to try doing it...Everyday I'll just show a picture for things I'm thankful for. Just so you know...these are in no particular order. They are just what happens to make me feel good the day that I post.

Starting today...

My boys! (All three of them.)

I am cheap!

I am cheap! I don't go to the movies too often, 'cause it's just too expensive. I normally pick and choose which ones would be better seen on the "big screen". If my husband and I don't feel it will make a difference...we typically wait for it to head to DVD. And when finally on DVD we don't usually go to Block buster (we only go there if we happen to have a gift card someone gave us), like I said I am cheap. Have you ever seen a "red box"? Only $1 for a movie for 1 night. Works for me! If we don't get it there then we usually borrow it fom the library (like I said, cheap). Today, however we will be heading to the theater itsself...

Do any of you have a Regal Cinema near you and have kids? They have what they call free family film festival all summer long (running when your local schools consider summer, so dates are slightly different). In my town, it is running every tues, wed and thurs morning at 10 am. They will play a G and a PG movie each week. They vary slightly from town to town. You should go to http://www.regmovies.com/ to check out what it's like in your town.

Last night A had a boy scout meeting and D had his last baseball game of the season, so they were both up late last night. Since the boys are tired today and it is gray and gloomy, we will be heading there this morning. This week they will be playing "Alvin and the Chipmunks" by us. Surprise, surprise...they both agreed that they want to see it. My 12 yr old wants to see a G rated movie! Will wonders never cease? I can tell you that I was shocked when I heard that one!

That should take care of half the day...